As human beings, we still have cave people wiring. Cave people needed to be safe from predators, and if human beings were not alert, they could easily be a meal for another animal. These threats are not present for most people, especially in the West.

What triggers us now is much different. Unfortuntely, we still have the same wiring. So when we get cut off by a driver or get into a tiff with a loved one or have a stern conversation with somebody that we work with or even get a rude message on social media our brain reacts as if we are getting attacked by an animal. Our wiring tells us that we need to pay attention and focus on threats more than the blessings in our lives. 

In fact, researchers call this the Lasado Ratio. Part of having new goals is taking on the challenges that go along with those goals. When you have a goal to lose weight you have to take on the challenge of finding time to go to the gym, budgeting more money for good food, and being sore the next day. When you open a company, you create the challenge of having to create a customer experience, marketing, sales, bookkeeping, and other challenges. All these have the potential to have negative thougths and even may stop you in your tracks. In addition, you might get stuck or be in a rut. If you are not careful, you can become a little or very jaded about life.

This is where gratitude and positivity come in. Gratitude is not only a pollyanna, feel good concept. It’s actually a principle of success. Part of success is figuring out what resources and who you can collaborate with on your path to success. If you are negative and perpetually jaded, you will have a hard time recognizing the blessings in your life, and the tools that you can use along the way. If you see tools as a waste or if you see everybody around you as enemies that you can not trust, then you will have trouble recognizing how you can use them on your path success.

When you learn how to leverage your network, your environment and the tools at your disposal, possibilities become clear.

There have been times when I was hyper-focused on my disability. I assumed it held me back in some form or another. I was acting like a victim and part of my definition of being a victim is blaming outside factors for not being where we want to be.

It’s the economy.

It’s corporate greed.

It’s politics.

It’s the in-laws.

It’s the deep state.

And…

In my case…

My disability.

The problem is there might even be a modicum of truth in what you think is holding you back. My disability makes it more challenging to achieve success. That’s my reality. However, there is reality and there is your reaction to reality. Reality is undefeated. All you can do is have a positive reaction to whatever occurs.

This is where gratitude and positivity come in. Negativity is counterbalanced by positivity. It’s challenging to counterbalance negativity with more negativity or even apathy. The way to counterbalance negativity is positivity and gratitude.

Here’s the caveat…

Gratitude is not only recognizing the blessings in your life. To fully exploit the habit of gratitude is to understand what those blessings are and more importantly to use those blessings to move forward.

I may have a disability, but I have many blessings that I can exploit. I always had amazing people in my life. I’ve always had people in my corner. I always had a drive to make my live amazing. Although those are great blessings, I needed to figure out how to infuse those into my goal.

I also needed to figure out ad learn what kind of help I could get and how I could ask for help.

It might be ethe fact that you need to make more money, but in order to make more money you might have to look at opportunities differently like getting additional professional training or even opening a side freelance business. You might have a challenging time losing weight but you can find a trainer in your area that can help you. You might have a rough time in your marriage, but there’s a couple of psychologists in your area that you can go to. Gratitude takes much of the focus off what can’t happen and places it onto what can happen.

Another benefit of gratitude is sometimes we just need to feel better a situation and but that situation into perspective. On stage, I often talk about my two hands my right arm has almost no control. If I let it lose it disrupts my whole body. In fact, most of the time, I pin it behind my back. My left hand is more useful. It’s far from perfect, but I can drive an electric wheelchair. I can peck on my keyboard. I can use a remote control. That’s very useful for a sports fan like me. Do I wish my hands were perfectly working? Of course. Do I wish my right hand was more like my left hand? You bet. I ask myself, what if my left hand were more like my right hand? I have determined that my life would be up to ten times more challenging than it is now. I would literally need assistance 20 hours a day. I would not be able to cross the room, look up something online, dial a phone, be alone for more than twenty minutes, or hundreds of activities that might seem pedestrian even to me. I often take long wheelchair rides and I cherish the independence but what if those were taken from me?

What if my disability caused behavioral problems? What if my parents did not love me? What if I was not so tenacious? All these are blessings that I cherish and am grateful for.

The reason that gratitude is a principle of success in my mind is because part of success is looking for and exploiting the possibilities of your life. If you are negative and don’t see the possibilities, you will have a challenging time cutting through all the negativity.

The last part of positivity and gratitude is that the point of success is to create a sense of satisfaction and downright joy. What is the point of success without some kind of satisfaction and joy. There’s always something else to strive for. There’s always more money to be made. There’s always one more milestone to hit. There’s always more power to grab. At some point you need to look at what you did and say, “I did it.” There are times when I am in the office with a long to-do list and every time we check off an item of have a good call or write something inspiring I take a little time to have even a ten second celebration. Sometimes I even involve others in that celebration.

The habit of gratitude is not only a warm and fuzzy concept, it’s necessary to see the blessings, the life’s opportunities, and your goals.