Everyone is just trying to go about their day and live their best life, achieve their goals, or maybe just survive. In the not-too-distant past, we understood that this was most likely the desire of most of the people around us, and we understood that we had to bear with others as they, too, went about trying to create a life. Now, it’s a little different. We live in a Burger King “have it your way” world. We don’t have to bear with anyone or anything. We can customize our newsfeeds and not interact with people we want to avoid. We are easily offended by people who don’t have our exact opinions about life and world view. We can have a customized experience, but it is an isolating experience.

There were periods in my life when I could only see my own challenges, and I assumed that having a disability was the worst thing in the world. There were times when I would come home, put on music, and fuel myself with a diet of frustration and even anger.

Needless to say, the plight and difficulties of others never entered my mind. My sole purpose while sitting alone in that room was to rest in my grief and anger. Truth be told, I may not have even been able to comprehend that able-bodied people could experience any type of suffering or pain.

One of the ways that I have learned to deal with the psychological ramifications of my disability is to really think and focus on what other people are feeling and going through. This gives me an understanding of the world and my own life that I would not have if I constantly focused on everything my disability took from me. I am able to see that the range of human emotions is not only felt by the disabled, but they are a part of the human common experience.

Understand and internalize that everybody is trying to achieve their own goals, deal with their challenges, and simply get through the day. That person might be a friend going through a rough patch, a spouse who just needs you to sit with them, or even a cashier who needs a thank you, a smile, or an inquiry about their day. Regardless of your familiarity with the “other”, you are still required to be the person who is not a boulder on their path but an unexpected flower that adds a little joy to their journey.

Being other-focused will help you be a more productive member of society. It will also help you achieve your goals. One of the reasons that I find purpose and meaning in producing content is that I’m forced to think and focus on something bigger than my challenges and more significant than my disability. When I write, help a friend, or even ask a stranger about their day, I connect with them. It’s my way to be a productive member of society.

Beyond improving your own life, part of success involves being there and serving other people. If you want a better marriage, you must serve your spouse better. If you want a better business, you must serve your employees and customers better. If you want to advance in your career, you must serve others. The bottom line is that part of success is helping others get what they want and need.

It’s time to start seeing people for who they are — human beings, not the enemy. They are not out to get you. They are not simply people who have opposing political opinions. They are fellow occupants of this rock we call Earth, and we must extend ourselves to steady one another as we try to make our time on this planet as positive as possible.

Remember, the “other” is just another person who is seeking to get by, take care of their family, break bread with loved ones, and have a little fun.